I woke with a start this morning at 5.30. I heard a knock and my sons voice calling me. Convinced he was outside the front door I leapt out of bed and ran to open it for him. Heart pounding I found no one there. My 14 year old asked me could he sleep over at a friends last night, and in my dream state I thought he had left his friends home and walked the 2 klm dark rural road to come home. He and I have a cantankerous parent – child relationship. He has a strong, persuasive, personality and more often than I am happy about, we clash on matters about his behaviour and unwillingness to conform. He will find a way every day to grab the headlines in our home. But he is also the more outwardly sensitive, caring, empathetic, deeply affectionate child, what could be described as ‘intense’. I have been described as intense by a past employer in a negative way and I have allowed it to affect me. But let me tell you what you will find when you are lucky enough to befriend such a personality.
Intense people are open, what you see is what you get, there will be no heirs and graces, pretences, trickery or underhanded or devious action on their part. This is not second nature to them and so they will have to try extremely hard to be so. This becomes too exhausting and they will fall back to their natural way of speaking before thinking, wearing their hearts on their sleeves.
Intense people are deeply loyal and grateful to friends, and family, teachers and employers who are good to them, they would walk to the ends of the Earth for you. But are also deeply sensitive to any disloyalty toward them and will prefer to end relationships that are one sided and move on.
Intense people are naturally caring and empathetic, advocate for the vulnerable. To see any person or animal mistreated causes them much upset and can often get them into trouble because they will wade in and stand up for any living thing they see as being mistreated or in need. They need a more emotionally even tempered friend/partner to help them see that they can’t save the whole world alone.
Intense people are very creative and need to use their creativity as an outlet to stay emotionally sound. Using their creativity as a career choice will bring much happiness, reward and benefit to them and their loved ones. Stunting their creativity will bring the opposite.
So does my son know how amazing he is? Have I told him? Of course but not near enough!